Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Zombie Honeymoon (2004)

Running Time: 83 minutes
Release Date: October 23, 2004
Review by: Chris   

'Til death do us part. Words to love by. But what if that love is the shambling horror born of Romero's magnum opus? 2004's indie horror fest Zombie Honeymoon is writer/director David Gebroe's swing at the question. Part horror and part romance with a sprinkling humor, made ZH impossible to pass up as a featured review for us here at TAF.

    Right off the bat it must be mentioned that Zombie Honeymoon is inappropriately titled. While yes, the events in our tale do occur during a honeymoon and it does involve the aforementioned zombie; the actual title "zombie honeymoon" makes you picture a carefree, zany, 70's gore and boob fest rife with puns, one liners and chainsaw-wielding hotties in tank tops.  Light-hearted is exactly what ZH is not. Inspired from the tragedy suffered by David Gebroe's younger sister at the loss of her husband, ZH is a hybrid of therapy and a "valentine to her strength, her ability to get through her grief and keep moving in life." What emerges is a seriously toned examination of what it is to wholly and completely give yourself to someone regardless of what has become of them. Far more art house than slasher fair. Are we having fun yet?

Saturday, April 26, 2014

The Entity (1982)

Running Time: 125 minutes
Release Date: February 4, 1983
Review by: Stacey

"A story so shocking, so threatening, it will frighten you beyond all imagination."  Solid tagline, dudes.  Sadly, it only delivered about 80% of that, and that's coming from someone (me, duh) who has this in her top 10 favorites.  Based on Frank De Felitta's novel of the same name and directed by Sidney J. Furie, "The Entity" was filmed in 1981 but didn't see a worldwide release until 1982 (US release was in '83).  The 70's and early 80's saw an influx of supernatural/demonic films in the horror genre because who doesn't love a good possession, amiright?  And probably because, for the same reason found footage films are so big right now, it works and we're intrigued.

Monday, April 21, 2014

100 Tears (2007) ++First video review!++

Running Time: 88 minutes
Release Date: June 23, 2007
Review by: Chris & Stacey

As stated in the title of this post, here is our first video review so watch and enjoy!


Stacey: 4/10 oversized clown cleavers

Chris: 6/10 unnecessarily large pants

Thursday, April 17, 2014

House aka Hausu (1977)

Running Time:  88 minutes
Release Date:  July 30, 1977
Review By:  Chris  

 Absurd. Daffy. Surreal. There are many adjectives in the English language. Without them it can be difficult to easily communicate abstract interpretations of a situation or thing. See i just used three right there. House is one such thing that can be difficult to verbalize. Not because fitting adjectives are unavailable, but to the contrary there are far too many adjectives available that seemly conflict with each other.

Friday, April 11, 2014

The Shrine (2010)

Running Time:  93 minutes
Release Date: July 25, 2010
Review by: Stacey

Looks like we've got a "new-ish" movie on our hands with 2010's The Shrine and it was a delightful damn surprise!  I originally watched this movie about 2 years ago and decided to re-watch last night and still enjoyed it as much as I did the first time.  Director Jon Knautz, who is known for his comedy/horror flick Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer,  switched it up with a genuinely creepy movie that seemed like some kind of demonic Wicker Man mashup. This was one that started off slow and a little "meh" in the first half and turned it right the hell around in the second half with a story that finally came out and made that first part worth watching.

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Cannibal Holocaust (1980)

Running Time:  96 minutes (uncut)
Release Date:  February 7, 1980
Review By:  Chris

"I wonder who the real cannibals are." The closing line of Cannibal Holocaust.
The leading contender for the worlds most banned film and the grandfather of "found footage" genre, directed by Ruggero Deodato,  Cannibal Holocaust has a near mythic and notorious reputation among cinephiles and horror enthusiasts alike. A marathon display of the viewer's stamina and strength of resolve up against a mad man's twisted and bloody nightmare. So what better launching point for us to use as we dive into the churning sea of cinema.

Friday, April 4, 2014

The Last House On The Left (1972)

Running Time: 84 min
Release Date: August 30, 1972
Review by: Stacey
I couldn't think of a better first review than Wes Craven's directorial debut The Last House On The Left, could you?  You may not share the same opinions as me or the same taste in horror movies as me, but that's okay!  We all share the same LOVE and appreciation for the horror genre and that's what matters.  This is going to be a fun and gorey adventure for all of us and maybe we'll learn a few things from each other along the way.  Now let's start, shall we?

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Heeeeeere's Stacey! (And sometimes Chris)

Welcome to my horror review blog.
(Fuck that clown)
This is my first time starting something that I feel is productive on the internet because horror is a big passion of mine and I wanted to make a place where I (and sometimes fellow friends) can spew all of our good/bad/unpopular opinions on movies in a genre that never goes out of style and aims to fill us with adrenaline and fear.  And because everything on the internet will suck after this.
This page will probably be a little basic to begin with as I'm mildly useless when it come to technology--I'm 27 with a 68 year old's mind-- so bear with me!  Hopefully you'll read some kickass reviews here and tell all of your horror-loving friends about it because that would be awesome.  

Real quick note for everyone: I'm Stacey.
From Texas.  Horror-obsessed.  Lover of all things gorey with a fondness for Italian horror especially.  I like Bagel Bites and space. 
But let's continue, shall we?

As you saw me mention in the title, my best friend Chris will be joining the blog more often than not to offer his thoughts on varying movies (and we'll even be combining brains to make review VIDEOS) but try not to love him more than me because then I'll have to kill him--JUST KIDDING...maybe...  As a matter of fact, I just received an e-mail from him today with his Cannibal Holocaust review and it's full of words and things and even a witty use of the term "turtle steaks",  so this place is already going to make you fall in love and want to throw money at us for no reason.
(Assuming you're all white businessmen)

I have a lot planned for this blog and I'm really excited about it (i.e. reviewing not just horror movies but horror-themed shows of my liking).  I'm also 100% open to recommendations and suggestions on movies that you would like us to see and review but I have ZERO idea how you would do that here so I'll be leaving my Tumblr link as well as my Twitter so feel free to leave me messages with your ideas.  The horror community is a great, big place and while 98% of it is an accepting place to be, there's that other 2% that form an elitist mentality with horror and I'm definitely going to say upfront right now that I am NOT one of those douchers.  We all love the same thing: HORROR. Let's hang out and be cool and make friends and talk about the same badass thing we all grew up to love.

So, I mean, I guess that's about it.  I just wanted to make a little intro to get the ball rolling and let y'all know what you're getting yourselves into!  I hope you stumble upon this blog through some magical, mystical way (or Google) and think it's rad enough to continue coming back and supporting we do.


p.s. Look out for the first review in the next few days!  Or you can put your e-mail in the little box to the right and be notified when new posts go up on the page!


Chris's Twitter: